New South Wales
Northern Territory
Queensland
South Australia
Tasmania
Victoria
Western Australia
North Island
South Island

5 Reasons NOT To Visit Australia

Catherine Atton
September 6, 2017

1. Beaches will no longer impress you

via GIPHY

Australia is brimming with beautiful beaches including Bondi, Whitehaven and drum roll please... world recordbreaker for the 'whitest sand' Hyams Beach. No other beach will EVER compare.

2. You'll become a fan of big rocks

via GIPHY

One thing that Australia does well is big rocks. In particular, a massive sandstone monolith in the heart of the "Red Centre" known as Uluru. Over 550 million years old and sacred to Australia's Aboriginal culture, this rock means business.

3. Every coffee you drink hereafter will taste like mud

via GIPHY

Melbourne's coffee culture is NEXT LEVEL. With over 1,600 cafes in the city alone and world champion baristas on every corner (literally) your skinny, soy, mocha, roasted from a Colombian blend won't come in short supply. It has a fab cafe culture that will make you think twice before brewing a cup of instant muck.

4. You'll make 'professional mermaid' your next job title

via GIPHY

Home to one of the Seven Natural Wonders of the World, the Great Barrier Reef is an aquatic dream. With plenty of scuba diving, snorkelling and sailing trips to take your fancy, you'll never want to leave those crystal clear waters! And inevitably, think that you genuinely could spend the rest of your life under the sea.

5. You won't be able to look at an avocado without smashing it

via GIPHY

'Smashed avo' is surprisingly (or rather unsurprisingly) an Australian delicacy. For the rest of us normal people it's mushy avocado on toast. But don't let that fool you, the Aussie Breakkie is a thing true of beauty, from Asian-infusion style dishes like chilli scrambled eggs at Sir, Charles in Fitzroy to smoked salmon & cream cheese bagels at Manchester Press in Melbourne's CBD. You won't be going hungry.

If you don't want to become a professional mermaid, never again enjoy an instant cup of coffee or become a fan of big rocks, then don't go to Australia, we repeat: DO NOT GO TO AUSTRALIA. Otherwise, sure why the hell not?!

AUTHOR PROFILE
Catherine Atton

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Related Posts

The road to Uluru

What's the best time to visit stunning Uluru?

Uluru, the heart of Australia's Red Centre, is a place of extraordinary beauty and deep cultural significance. Understanding the best time to visit this iconic landmark is crucial to making the most of your journey. Whether you're drawn to the awe-inspiring landscapes, rich Aboriginal culture, or thrilling adventures, here's how to plan your visit for […]

the rocks sydney

What to expect from Sydney in August

Sydney in August still has crisp winter days, but the first hints of spring are appearing so it’s a perfect time for exploring. With temperatures ranging from 10°c to 19°c, August in Sydney has some amazing walking tours, food tours and even stargazing on offer. Indulge All Your Senses Sydney’s most famous landmarks are definitely […]

entice whitsundays sailing trip

The absolute best time to visit the Whitsundays

The Whitsundays, a stunning archipelago of 74 islands off the coast of Queensland, is a dream destination for travellers seeking pristine beaches, turquoise waters, and unforgettable experiences. Whether you're interested in sailing, snorkelling, or simply relaxing on the soft white sands of Whitehaven Beach, timing your visit to the Whitsundays can make all the difference. […]

Australian Slang: 50+ Words & Phrases You Need to Know

Australia is well-known for its beautiful beaches and gorgeous sunny weather, but beyond that, it’s also known for having a rather weird take on the English language. Whether you’re planning to visit Down Under soon and want to brush up on your Australian slang, or you’re already here and need a hand understanding the locals, […]

spirit of cairns sunset cruise

Things to Do in Cairns at Night

With its balmy evenings year-round, it's no wonder Cairns is a top destination for those wanting to explore Australia without the need to pack a puffer jacket. Thanks to the warm weather, there are numerous things to do in Cairns at night, making it a perfect spot for both early risers and night owls. If […]

Matador whitsundays cruise

A Guide to the Top 10 Whitsundays Cruises

Known for its calm blue waters, diverse marine life, and stunning white sand beaches, the Whitsunday Islands are the perfect place for a tropical getaway. Located near the Great Barrier Reef in the Coral Sea, this magnificent archipelago is teeming with tropical marine life, and Whitsundays cruises are undoubtedly the best way to explore its […]

Social Media

Accepted Payments

Members of

chevron-down